The Love Life Blog: real advice for real people. 


Three Types of Sex All Couples Need

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, November 19, 2017



I like to divide sexual encounters in a long-term relationship into three types:

Simple Sex – short and comforting
Sensual Sex - luscious and bonding
Spicy Sex – exciting and adventurous
 read more...



Seven Benefits of Attending A LoveLife Couples Tantra Retreat

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, July 23, 2017

https://youtu.be/f2XmB-_m1VY 

Taking a break together is always a good thing to do, helping you relax and rejuvenate and hopefully have some quality sexy time away from the stresses of everyday life.

So why would you add a couples retreat to your time away? What are the benefits to you of going to one of my LoveLife Couples Retreats?

Well, where do I start?! Feeling the love and connection in the group and seeing the couples blossom is an experience that’s hard to put into words.

But I’ll try...

 read more...



Make Sex Your Hobby

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, July 16, 2017



What is a hobby? According to the dictionary it’s “an activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure.” That sounds like sex to me!

We all know that it’s good for couples to have a mutual hobby - cooking, gardening, sport, travel, outdoor recreation, decorating, traveling, study. It gives us something to talk about, to experiment with and to enjoy together.

You’re being intimate anyway, so why not give your sex life the same focus and attention that you give any hobby?



 read more...



Partnered Sex is Not Solo Sex for Two

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, July 09, 2017



…which means it’s not “getting each other off”.

Solo sex is about having an orgasm, experimentation, self-education or any number of things, but it’s not about sharing.

Partnered sex is about sharing pleasure. read more...



Third Level Love-Making

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, December 04, 2016

 

There’s a wise old saying about spiritual and personal growth:

First there is the mountain

Then there is no mountain

Then there is the mountain again.

What this means is that you have normality, then that disappears while you grow and experience its opposite, and then a new normality comes back again as you integrate the experiences of personal growth.

This ’new’ reality is never the same reality as the one you had before - it might look the same to a casual observer but your experience of it is quite different.

If we’re talking about sex and intimacy, and human sexual potential, then the process is the same as for spiritual growth. read more...



Sex Therapy & Couples Retreats- What to do if You have a Reluctant Partner

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, September 24, 2016

 

So often people contact me to say that they want to come in for therapy and coaching sessions, or that they want to attend one of my workshops….but their partner doesn’t.

“How can I persuade him/her to come along?” they plead.

It’s a tricky one. You love your partner and you want to improve your sexual connection and through that your life together. You are willing to open up to in private sessions, or expose yourself to some degree in a group situation (not literally, my workshops are decidedly clothes on!), yet your partner is reluctant.

There are a number of reasons why your partner might be reluctant: read more...



Seven Benefits of Attending a Couples Retreat

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, July 30, 2016




I’m back from running another gorgeous Couples Retreat in the Blue Mountains last weekend. I’m feeling all loved up myself from being surrounded by couples celebrating their love and honouring their sexuality as an expression of that love. It really is such a wonderful experience that I want to tell you all the good reasons to attend.

I was going to write this myself, and then I received this feedback from one couple who attended - and so I figured that rather than me waxing lyrical about it, it’d be much better for you to hear from the participants themselves! read more...



Ban Penetration!

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, July 23, 2016



…the word that is, not the act.

 read more...



Toys for Grown-Ups

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, June 11, 2016


 
I’m always stressing that sex is playtime for grown-ups. Sex is about sharing pleasure. That means being creative and experimental and generally having fun with the whole thing.

One element of playtime is…toys! Yes, just as kids can play with toys, so can we grown-ups. It’s fun!

Occasionally people say to me, ‘But it’s unnatural to use sex toys’. Oh for heaven’s sake, so is using a toothbrush, but I’m sure you use one every day.

In fact I doubt sex toys are ‘unnatural’ at all, I’m sure they go back as long as humans have existed. One of the outstanding features of humans is our ability to be creative and devise tools and gadgets. Phallic shaped artefacts have been found all over the world from ancient times, and while the archeologists might call them ‘objects of worship’ or similar, I’m quite sure they had a more ‘practical’ use as well… read more...



The Picnic Approach to Sex

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, May 14, 2016




The standard approach to sex is rather like a three course meal, it proceeds in set stages: you kiss a bit, fondle a bit (maybe give her an orgasm), then have vigorous intercourse until he comes. The End.

It’s not a bad model for sex, but it’s limited, and can get pretty boring over time.

I suggest you approach sex more like a picnic, with everything available at once and you pick and choose whatever you want in whatever quantity and in whatever order you please.  read more...



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