A male client sent me a lovely email thanking me for teaching him a specific energy circulating technique. This is what he wrote: read more...
The LoveLife Blog: guidance on mindful, bodyful, soulful loving!
Firstly, let me apologise on behalf of my profession that, in the early 21st century, we still don’t know how women’s bodies work! I find it appalling that there’s still debate over what’s in our vaginas and what effect touching various parts produces! read more...
There’s a beautiful quote from the Kama Sutra, which I found in Deepak Chopra’s gorgeously illustrated version:
Sex is a paradox. It needs the difference between man and woman, yet it reminds them that they are not different at all. In this way pleasure is the world’s great equalizer.
This drew me because so much of my work relates to the masculine and feminine sexual energies. These energies are what you bring to the sex act. Yet what you feel and express matters very little between the lovers, male or female.
I opened up the morning’s paper to see yet another political ‘scandal’. In this case the parliamentary Minister was caught going to a gay sex club. In disgrace the Minister steps down, his professional and private life in ruins as his despicable behaviour is plastered across the front pages of the country’s newspapers.
His heinous sin? Liking to watch men have sex. Possibly even liking to have sex with men. read more...
We often hear about women having trouble with orgasms, and generally with men it’s thought that they have the opposite problem, that they come too quickly.
So when a man has trouble coming, or can’t come at all, he might feel that there’s something wrong with him. It can be very lonely for a mane to feel
But it’s actually very common for men not to come. It’s called Retarded or Delayed Ejaculation, and most men will encounter it at least sporadically in their lives. If it’s happening repeatedly though, it can be a problem. Particularly if the woman thinks it’s because he’s not attracted to her.
Have you been practicing eating a peach? Savouring its juicy lushness…?
Have you found within you the ability to lose yourself in that peach, to taste, suck, lick and devour it with full sensory awareness and heightened arousal?
Well, hold that space and let’s take that a step further. We’re going to add some technique and look at how to consume an ice-cream. read more...
Sensuality is without a doubt a key element to great sex. Sensuality, intimacy, surrender, eroticism – all essential elements that don’t necessarily have anything to do with the genitals.
We have five senses which can constantly bring us delectable, luscious sensuous experiences. If we’re open to them.
Once we are, we can bring that awareness into our love-making – and make magic.
Let’s practice. Choose a peach, or any other other suitably juicy fruit such as a mango. read more...
I incorporate the energetic aspect of sex strongly into the work I do with private clients and in workshops. Personally I believe that without this understanding of sex it’s very difficult to correct problems and to move towards reaching your sexual potential.
The energetic traditions I draw from are both Tantric and Taoist, as well as my own experiences in the martial arts, particularly aikido (which translates as ‘the way of harmony’ and which is extraordinarily like sex, in the sense that is simultaneously still and moving, physical and spiritual, strong and soft, and constantly requiring connection and flow).
There are some very useful analogies about sexual energy and I love to share with modern people that they generally find quite illuminating. Here’s one:
There’s a great article I wrote in the latest edition of Men’s Health Magazine on Sex for Busy People.
Why a “Blackbelt” in the Bedroom?
I'm about to launch seminars for Men Only called Blackbelt in the Bedroom. Obviously the title is catchy (what man wouldn’t want to be a blackbelt in the bedroom?) and that’s why I’m using it, but commericial cynicism aside, there are very good reasons why I’m chosen the term “blackbelt”.
- How to Stay In Love
- Expanding Your Sexual Play Pt 2: How
- Expanding Your Sexual Play Pt 1: What
- Simple Sex is Good Sex
- Solo Sex: Mindful Masturbation
- Own the Crone
- Porn Star vs Prude
- “When One is Pretending, the Whole Body Revolts”
- Non-Linear Love-Making: the Picnic Approach to Sex
- Your Bedroom As Sanctuary
- Sexy Debriefing
- Getting "Love Drunk"
- Make-Over Your Sex Life
- Be Real, Express Freely
- The Fairy Tales Got It Wrong
to my LOVELIFE blog for regular inspiration on sex, love and intimacy!